


Good Little Soldier

by ererial



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, College, Daddy Kink, Deepthroating, Depression, Drug Use, Eventual Smut, F/F, Light BDSM, M/M, Porn With Plot, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-25
Updated: 2016-05-27
Packaged: 2018-06-10 14:28:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6960763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ererial/pseuds/ererial
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren's on scholarship to attend Maria University, a prestigious and well-known school that he'd never been able to afford otherwise. Especially after he suffered the abandonment of his family. Levi's a senior, and takes an interest in Eren - but even those with the most innocent of intentions can wreak the most havoc upon a boy's heart, and have devastating consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part I

_"I love you."_

It's a simple phrase. Three words. Eight letters.

But one phrase can make the world a difference.

Those were the words my mother spoke as she looked me in the eyes and took her last breath.

Those were the words my father failed to ever confess to anyone under his roof.

Those were the words that made Mikasa realize that I was _actually_ leaving, _actually_ going to college, _actually_ going to be on my own.

Maria University was  _actually_ going to be my home for the next few years.

In the beginning, college was fun. Nobody took their classes seriously, and parties were all the rage. I enjoyed the parties. I didn't mind drinking or smoking, so there was really no reason to  _not_ go to one every weekend or so. I never realized how fun life can be when you're not drowning in the elegant dramatics of high school -  _or a looming, overprotective older sister._ I became somewhat of a frequent partygoer, but never an idiotic one. I never threw up on the front lawn and I never lost myself in alcohol so much that I couldn't remember the night before. I had fun, but didn't endanger myself. 

I slept with a few girls, sure. I'd lost my virginity in high school, to a girl named Historia - who swears that I was so bad she turned gay and ended up dating her best friend instead. I didn't care much for sex, though. I didn't get much from it. I'd been approached before with questions concerning my sexuality. I've only ever slept with girls my entire life, so I never put much thought into it.  I had never felt attraction toward another male, and never gave it the slightest consideration.

Until _that_ night.

 o o o o o o

"Eren, there's a party this weekend." Annie barely glanced up from her coffee as she spoke to me. I did, however, and raised my eyebrows at her. I met her in one of my mathematics classes, only because we both badmouthed the professor and got kicked out of class. Unofficially. We're lucky the professor is lenient, because I could've risked my scholarship. That means I'd be going home again, and that means I'd pretty much lose my freedom, too. 

I knew she wouldn't say anything more. "We can go," I said. "Haven't been to one in a couple weeks, actually."

"Sounds good," she agreed.

That's how I ended up here. I couldn't bear to be around the sweaty bodies and the living room on fire, so I retreated to the kitchen. I grabbed a bottle of beer and downed it, but almost choked when someone entered the room unannounced and started speaking to me. "I'm sure that's not the only thing that you can down."

I slammed the bottle down, maybe a little too hard, and coughed for a solid twenty seconds before catching my breath. "What?" 

Then I decided to look up, and look at the intruder. 

I almost choked again.

He was definitely short - at least four inches shorter than myself - but  _damn._ His raven hair was styled in an undercut, which perfectly framed his angular jawline, and his short stature was saved by the strength that emanated from his body. His cool grey eyes seemed to unravel every last secret I kept with one sweep, and I felt like fainting.

_How was a man so attractive?_

From that moment, I considered myself very sexually confused.

His left eye dropped down into a sultry wink, and I felt my cheeks flare up. He approached me with confident steps, and I didn't realize I was backing up until my butt hit the counter behind me. He was right in front of me. _Right_  there. His eyes scanned my face, and dropped to my lips, and I wasn't oblivious enough to miss the seductive glimmer in his eyes.

"Levi." He said. "Levi Ackerman." _His voice_. I grabbed the counter on either side of me, genuinely believing that my knees would give out. I had never found myself this taken with anyone, especially not a girl.  _Yep, I'm gay. Definitely gay._

"E-Eren," I muttered. I wanted to hit myself. Hard. Why was I acting like a pussy all of the sudden?

He nodded, satisfied. He bit his lip, and glanced downwards between our bodies. I suddenly became painfully aware of the bulge growing in my pants with every second Levi spent in such close proximity to my own body. He was more than aware of it, too, and I knew he planned on taking full advantage of it.

I let my eyes stray towards the living room, where I left Annie dancing with some girl she thought was hot. I didn't know how she'd react if she walked in on anyth-

 _Lips_. Levi's lips. Pressed against my own. Moving. I didn't hold back. Levi started off strong, roughly pushing up against me fully against the counter and bringing his hands up to my hair and weaving between the strands. Suddenly, he pulled painfully strong on my hair, but instead of any indication of pain I found myself moaning like a whore. My hands wound around his waist, landing at the bottom of his spine, but didn't do anything.

Levi pulled away for a split second, annoyance and slight irritation written across his face. "Tch, shitty brat. _Do_ something."

He kissed me again, with just as much fervor, and I decided then and there to not hold back any longer. I wanted this, he wanted this. While we kissed, I put my hands on his ass, and lifted him up so his legs wrapped around my waist. I then spun so he was sitting on the counter, never breaking our kiss. I pulled myself closer to him, and for a brief second, our crotches rubbed against each other - causing delightfully painful friction.

"Eren?!"

I jumped and disconnected from Levi's body within a second, whirling around to see Annie. She had her arms crossed, a smirk playing on her lips, and the girl she danced with earlier was behind her, blushing furiously, having caught me kissing another guy. I rubbed the back of my neck, trying to say something, but nothing came to mind. Meanwhile, Levi hopped off the counter, and fixed his clothes. He looked impeccable no matter what, though.

"You've got some explaining to do. Since when did you have a thing for guys?" Annie questioned further. I knew she really didn't need to ask, and that she'd ask again when we left the crowds and got back to our apartment, but she wanted to embarrass me in front of Levi.

I opened my mouth to respond, but Levi took it upon himself. He shrugged, saying, "I don't know how long he's been holding back, but he definitely likes dick." He began walking away, slapping my ass lightly in a way that Annie wouldn't catch, which sent my cheeks aflame yet again. "Well," he conceded as he walked off, "he likes _mine_."

 

 o o o o o o

For a girl who was usually closed-off and one hell of an introvert, Annie sure didn't hide her amusement at the situation. No matter how I tried to defend myself, I just ended up blubbering like a goddamn idiot, and eventually I decided I would be better off not speaking about it yet. We retreated to the living room of our apartment after we abandoned the party. I took the floor, and let Annie use the couch, and we watched whatever show looked interesting enough to keep our attention. 

I had popcorn beside me, and Annie sipped on a beer. Halfway into the show, Annie spoke up during a commercial break. "Honestly, Eren, if you're gay that's perfectly fine." Her voice was so compassionate, so understanding, and I found myself wanting to hug her. "I just hope you don't feel the need to hold back and deny yourself what you want for any reason." She paused. "Levi's a senior, you know."

Annie's a sophomore, even though she does share some classes with me. I only knew one other person at Maria University - a pompous junior, Jean, who was too rich for his own good and cared too little about everyone else's feelings. Annie, though quiet in nature, seemed to know just about everything about anything at the University, which made her a _very_ resourceful friend when needed. 

"What's he like?" I asked. I found myself very distracted, ever since he kissed me.  _He kissed me._ When I wasn't thinking about the kiss, I thought about those eyes, and if it wasn't those eyes, it was those arms, and - let's just settle on saying that I couldn't get my mind off of him. I glanced at Annie, whose blue eyes were on the television. Her blonde hair was sprawled out around her, and I realized that she was a very good-looking girl - I just couldn't see myself with her. With anyone, really.

Besides Levi.

Annie shrugged. "He skips out on class a lot. Smokes. He's nice enough to those he seems to like, so I think you're good." She sipped her beer. "He's respectful, though. He's never treated a girl wrongly, for any reason. He's publicly gay, so girls who take an interest in him spread a lot of rumors and talk a lot of shit. But he handles it well."

I found myself feeling bad for Levi. Even if he could hand it perfectly fine on his own, it was unfair to be treated badly because of something so insignificant.

"He's very, very secretive, though. I'm warning you, Eren. Be careful if you want to stay involved with him." I gulped as she spoke, and for once she met my eyes. "From what I know, he's decent. From others, he's not so decent. I honestly can't tell what is the truth and what's pure rumor."

Inside, I was yearning to know more about Levi. He was straightforward and blunt, but I didn't see anything bad in him. I was curious. _Too_ curious. Perhaps it was the novelty of the situation, or maybe I was just that taken with the man. 

I nodded. "You can't be sure about anybody, honestly." I reasoned. "I'll be careful. I know you've got my back, so I think I'm safe."

She smiled. It was one of her rare, genuine smiles. I earned those somewhat often from her, never in public, since she had to keep up the stone facade she had on display, but behind closed doors even she couldn't deny she had a soft spot for me. It wasn't long before her phone rang, and she smiled wider, if possible, and excused herself to talk to her special lady.

I figured the night was over, and switched off the television. I set the popcorn bowl on the counter, only half-eaten, and threw Annie's empty beer bottle away. Passing her bedroom on the way to my own, I heard her giggling at something and found myself elated for her happiness. She deserved a girl who'd treat her right, so I hoped everything would work out with this one. I found solace in the comfort of the blankets wrapped around me, shutting my eyes and falling asleep to the sound of rain pattering on the window. All the while, my dreams and thoughts were plagued by grey eyes and expert lips.

 


	2. Part II

_Steam_. 

Despite having gotten the same order of coffee for years, I never found it in myself to remember that the drink is  _hot,_ that the steam coming out of the cup means it's  _hot,_ and that drinking it immediately will make my mouth  _really_ hot. 

I sat in the same booth nearly every time I visited this cafe. It was a cute little place, Sina Coffee, and I felt comfortable whenever I came here to have a coffee and do homework. Yeah, I fucked around and partied, but more than anything I needed to keep my grades semi-decent to keep the scholarship. 

That's the one and only reason I found myself sitting at Sina, at seven in the morning, on a Saturday. 

I ignored the customers that came and left, and minded my own business. I couldn't focus too much, though, thanks to a certain douche who liked to be a tease. I scanned the assignment on my laptop over for the fourth time, but all I got from it was something about government, and...

"Tch. You actually do work?"

I almost spat out my coffee when I recognized that voice. Those grey eyes met mine from across the booth and I tried to play it cool. I couldn't form words, though. I rolled my eyes instead. "Levi."

He raised a speculative eyebrow, and scoffed. Something mischievous sparkled in his eyes, and he cleared his throat as he leaned forward, inches away from my face. I stood my ground, and instead of blushing or backing out, I mirrored his expression. "Eren."

My eyes widened at the tone of his voice, and I realized he was giving me the bedroom eyes for a reason. He spoke those two syllables, and every sound coming from his lips went straight to my groin. I was somewhat irritated - Why did he decide to do this here, of all place? Can't he tell I'm kind of busy? - and I opened my mouth to retaliate with something smart, but stopped. What do I say to that?

He smirked, knowing he got me. He leaned back, being the smug little shit he is, and crossed his arms. 

I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly, and glanced around before meeting his eyes again. "What do you want with me?" I questioned. Surely he had something - anything - better to do with his time than talk to me. He sighed, and picked up my coffee. I wasn't paying attention, but I couldn't help but let out a small whine when he drank from it. "Really, dude?"

He set it back down, chuckling under his breath. "I'm not quite sure what I want with you." He mumbled. The look on his face, in his eyes - I knew he was up to no good whatsoever. "However, I can't even begin to explain..." He leaned forward, eyes cast down at my lips, then back up to my own. Was I moving forward, too? I was. Shit. We were really close. Too close. Flags were going off. "The things that I want to do _to_ you."

Someone let out a little moan - _shit_. That would be me. I pushed back instantly, cursing the blush crawling onto my cheeks and biting my lip.  _Did I really just moan out loud? What the fuck?_

Levi shrugged, as if to say,  _you can't deny it._ He wasn't wrong, but that didn't make me hate him any less.

_Like you could hate Levi._

I shut my laptop, and sighed. "Why are you up this early? Aren't seniors supposed to have super intense, painful hangovers every Saturday?" I stood up, packing up my stuff, and he followed suit.

"Some do. But if we know there's something better waiting for us the next morning, we avoid the alcohol."

I was rendered speechless by his words, so I didn't say a word. He followed me out the cafe, and I barely glanced both ways before stepping onto the crosswalk to get to campus. Almost instantly, simultaneously, a horn blared incredibly loudly and I was being tugged by the wrist, spun back, and bumped right into Levi. I heard the driver of the car telling me to fuck off, and I didn't realize I was panting heavily until it drove away. 

Levi frowned, and glanced me once over. "You alright, brat?" Nod. "You hurt?" Shook my head. "Did I hurt your wrist?" Shook my head. "Di-"

"Levi," I said. I was taken aback slightly by the concern, but shook it off. "I'm fine." He nodded, and for a moment, seemed to be somewhat frustrated by something. I ignored it, and continued crossing the street when it was safe. He followed, but we went our separate ways not long after, and I was forced to push thoughts of the cocky midget to the back of my mind.

o o o o o

Annie dragged me to yet another party, and I had left my schoolwork unfinished in the living room. I was being impulsive, unreasonable, and stupid about all things concerning Levi, and Annie held an unspoken understanding over what was distracting me. That being said, she believed the best cure was to get laid by someone else.

Hence why I was in Jean's house, buzzed, and wandering along by myself.

Annie had met up with that girl - which I had no problem with, because hell, I wanted her happy - but I wanted  _Levi._ Frowning, I downed an entire bottle of beer and looked around the apartment. The living room was crowded beyond belief, and I barely caught the door opening. And Levi walking in. _And making eye contact with him._

I rolled my eyes, spun around, and ran right into the infamous Jean Kirstein, clad in a plain grey shirt and that odd blonde-brown hair. I began to fall backwards, but he grabbed my forearms and pulled me up slightly so I wouldn't make a complete idiot of myself. He raised an eyebrow. "Wow, Jaeger. I knew I was hot, but didn't think I'd get you falling head over heels for me."

I gave him a look. "Jean."

He smirked, and his eyes shot over to something behind me before focusing on me again. He stepped closer a little, while I didn't move. "Eren, I know we don't get along well in school, but I think we'd do well together in bed."

My eyes widened. "What?"

He moved his hands to my waist and tugged me closer, and I was too shell-shocked and confused to do anything about it. I faintly heard someone calling my name, but before I fully registered who it was, Jean's lips were on mine. And I wasn't necessarily _not_ enjoying it. I pulled away for a second, and realized that Levi was the one who had said my name, and for a split-second I wanted to go to Levi and apologize for the kiss. But then I remembered my unhealthy obsession with him. 

I felt the fingers of my right hand curl up in a fist, pulling Jean's shirt tight against his chest and pulling him towards me. He had a point, about us not getting along well in school. He was a fucker who I found myself wanting to punch a lot of the time. But this - this was nice. Jean ushered me to the wall, and his large frame seemed to trap my own, and I was overwhelmed by to ferocity of his kiss. 

No matter how good of a kisser Jean was, though, I could never compare it to Levi's kiss.

We pulled apart, and I felt quite flustered. He grinned. "Thanks, Jaeger. Just wanted to make someone jealous. But if you ever do wanna get laid, call me. Got it?"

I rolled my eyes, and pushed him away from me. "No thanks. I'm not that into bestiality, okay?"

He glared at me, and I glared back, until he accepted defeat and left. I sighed, picking up another beer in the kitchen, and saw Levi outside on the porch. The door was open, so I simply stepped outside, and stood beside his figure. His jaw was clenched, and I saw billows of smoke rising from in front of him. "It's no good to smoke, Levi." I said, a slight slur affecting my speech. He merely glanced my way before looking ahead, ignoring my presence. "Jesus. What's got you all fucked up?"

"Nothing," he growled. "I'm just sick and tired of shitty brats doing shitty things."

"Are you..." It took me a moment to figure out what word I wanted to say. "Jealous?"

He chuckled, but wasn't amused. "Tch. Fuck no. And if I was, it wouldn't be because of you, I can assure you that."

That didn't hurt. It didn't make my heart squeeze that he was so determined to be hostile to me. It didn't hurt knowing that whatever I felt, here, was unrequited. I nodded, and tried to act unbothered. Before I knew it, my mouth was opening and forming words before my brain even processed how I felt and I was speaking out of pain, even if it was all a bunch of lies. "Good. Because if me and Jean are going to be a thing now, I don't need you coming between us."

Levi stiffened.

I just couldn't stop.

"You know, he's the first guy I've been attracted to. I wouldn't be surprised if we were together for a while." I paused, and in my drunken state I was speaking with reckless abandon and acting out on my emotions. "He's actually really hot in bed. I can't wai-"

In a matter of seconds, Levi had put his cigarette out, thrown it over the banister of the porch into the rocks, and grabbed my hair. His fingers clutched tightly to my brown locks and pulled me in close, roughly, not caring how I felt but knowing that I liked it.

"Really, now?' He inquired, speaking lowly and quietly. He yanked on my hair so that the side of my neck was exposed, and he dragged his tongue down from my jawline to my collarbone, sucking lightly before speaking again. "Because I think you're full of shit."

I looked at him through lidded eyes. He read me like a fucking book. He knew I wasn't actually into Jean, and we weren't actually a thing, and that I actually wanted him. And it killed me. I felt too exposed, too vulnerable, and I hated it with every fiber of my being.

He leaned in close, his lips ghosting over my own. Every now and then our lips would brush against one another's as he spoke. "Jaeger, I don't know who the fuck you think you are," he muttered, "but I know that I want that pretty ass of yours whipped into shape by none other than myself. Because you've been bad, going around and kissing other people, huh?"

I felt a whine being pulled form my lips, and I wanted to hit myself. Always. "L-Levi," I whispered. He smirked, letting go of me completely and stepping back to examine the flustered mess he created. His eyes shone bright despite the little light surrounding us, and he patted my chest before he walked off. "Be a good boy, Jaeger, and I'll reward you."


End file.
